Friday, May 2, 2014

Becoming a bit Dutch


 It's funny, but one of the unexpected things that changed in me when I became a mother is that I lost whatever fear for ridicule I had left and I just started speaking Dutch to everyone. I don't care anymore if I speak it with an accent or if I am constructing grammatically perfect sentences. I have this need to understand everything and to be a full part of the society. It started at the hospital, where even-though most of the personnel was fluent in English, I insisted on getting the explanations in Dutch and on trying to answer back in Dutch as well.


Then, last weekend the whole country celebrated Queen's King's day and I insisted on wearing my Royal-Delft -Blue-and -windmills sheer blouse, painting my face and dressing the kid in an orange onesie (after all, she wouldn't be here if it wasn't for the health system, how could I not feel the 'Hup Holland Hup'* when we pretty much owe our daughter to this country).


Oh and I have become obsessed with getting the best deals, buying everything in discount and collecting coupons. It's like a sport. I get a thrill of buying stuff (that we would normally buy anyway, like detergent, toothpaste or bread) at half of its price. It reminds me of Lily Allen's: 'Nan you're a window shopper' ("You only buy the paper to cut out the coupons, You-re saving 50p but what do you want with tampons"). We've always tried to be frugal, but I am taking this to a whole other level. 


King's day (former Queen's day) is such a fun day because aside from the general festive environment the whole country turns into a giant flea market (or vrijmarkt) and all kids take the opportunity to bring out their old toys and resell them or trade them. I think it is a great lesson in recycling and reusing. And little Yu got her first, colourful wooden walker for 5 EUR. The husband didn't want to let me buy it because: "where are you going to keep it?", but I ended up convincing him. It's so cute. Of course I wanted to get all the wooden toys, but unfortunately, that was not allowed.

Have you ever adopted traditions from places you've lived or traveled to?

12 comments:

  1. It looks like such an awesome celebration. We don't really have anything similar in the UK, not annually at least.

    I love that motherhood is making you feel more Dutch. Your daughter is Dutch I guess, so that makes you a little Dutch family.

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    1. Yes, it's weird how it happened, but it definitely has to do with the fact that these are going to be (at least a part) of little Yu's roots. You should "hop" over once, I think it's a nice celebration to see, particularly in Amsterdam (though it gets crazy crowded).

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  2. Ah, Queen's Day! (Or at least it was the last time I celebrated). Such a fun holiday!

    I love what you say about Yulia's existence being partly down to that country. Her Dutch roots go deep! Even though we're not actually *in Austria*, I feel some parallels to what you're saying...I've always been married to an Austrian guy, but having a child who is one half that cultural heritage also connects me to it more fully.

    You look adorable in that picture!

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    1. It definitely is fun, though it took a while to grow into it (I kind of hate crowds... I like to be able to move independently and sometimes that is not possible).

      And yes, it is amazing, you'll soon see, how some things just snap. It's like a switch and things just change in one second (obvious, I know, but you only really understand until you live it).

      Thanks!

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  3. Ah, I volunteered at a Koningsdag get together sponsored by KLM, the Dutch Consulate and other organizations here in New York on Sunday. I wasn't what I was expecting, but I think that was mainly because since I was volunteering I was "stuck" in the food stand and wasn't able to walk around. Plus I rather naively thought that since it was Koningsdag in NY that people would be speaking English, and well my Dutch is not quite at a level where I can have full conversations with people. One thing I did find out was that when in Dutch company if you want to be the most popular person in the gathering all you have to do is hold a tray of bitterballen and you'll be constantly surrounded by people! lol... it was quite comical. I get it though, those bitterballen were rather tasty!

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    1. That sounds like a fun event! Some people have a stand during a portion of the day, and walk around the rest of the time. I guess (hope) it was good practice for your Dutch anyway. And yeah you got it, people will be where the bitterballen are! They are good huh?

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  4. I agree with Sadie, you do look adorable in that picture!

    I find it so interesting that having Yu made you more committed to speaking Dutch. It's always quite awkward for the first week or so after making that jump to speaking a new language full-time in public, but afterwards I always find it worth it. Somehow speaking the local language deepens my experience of a place. When I lived in Mozambique, everyone spoke Portuguese, but I insisted on saying the greeting in their local dialect. I found people warmed up to me so much more quickly when I greeted them that way rather than in Portuguese.

    Our family situation is similar to yours in that we are a multi-cultural family and I'm sure that having our baby will make that ever more apparent. Even in choosing names, deciding which language of books to buy, which traditions to celebrate (Christmas on Christmas morning or nochebuena?) I love the mixture of cultures!

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    1. Thank you.

      I think speaking in the local language for sure breaks the ice and helps cross bridges. It is hard, but then suddenly the connections are easier.

      Traditions are so interesting, We are doing Nochebuena + Christmas day + 2nd Christmas day (as per Dutch tradition). And then, los 3 Reyes (Epiphany as well), And some candy and cookies for Sinterklaas. Mixing cultures is the best !

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  5. Definitivamente hay cosas que adoptamos sin darnos cuenta, Amanda... Pero creo que todavía no me llena de entusiasmo las tradiciones holandesas. De hecho, luego del fin de semana del Día del Rey y ahora que viene el Día de la Liberación, me pongo a pensar que eso lo único que me recuerda cuantos años ya los he celebrado! Pffff... Mejor que un calendario!
    Aunque ahora que estuve en Chile, extrañe mucho mi vida holandesa. Definitivamente uno se va haciendo de la cultura aunque no lo quiera, y me imagino que con hijos más rápido!

    Saludos por allá para los tres y... Keep it up with the dutch!!!

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    1. Sí, creo que es inconsciente. A mí como mencionaba el día de la reina me daba un poco igual, y la verdad es que no me encantan los tumultos (por eso no iría a Amsterdam, aunque el día del Gay pride sí que es especial, los botes con gente enfiestada son lo más divertido).

      Poco a poco vamos adoptando unas costumbres aquí y otras allá y de pronto cuando te das cuenta... eres una mezcla ("no soy de aquí, ni soy de allá"). Aunque claro que las raíces, el punto de origen, no se pierden nunca.

      Muchos saludos por allá, a disfrutar de la primavera tropical y el cielo azul.

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  6. Loved this post. Good for you for diving in. I think maybe motherhood lowers our inhibitions about the little things huh? Also, maybe having your daughter being born there helps you to truly "belong" to Holland in a way that you didn't before?

    Anyhow, I was thinking of you and wondering how you three are doing. Also was thinking of you because I was wondering about your identity as a mom now, when before you had talked about how it was hard not to have your job in the veterinary field. Now, as a mom, I wondered if you felt that same yearning to work or if you feel more content? Clearly, this is based on my own experiences and wondering if others feel the same way!

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    1. You are so right, that is exactly it, having Yulia makes me feel like I belong in ways I never did before, not even when I was working.

      We are doing really well. I do still yearn to work in my field, or at least in a health related area, but I would like to do so in a year and a half or so. I am extremely content though, really, truly happy, calm, in the moment . (Not to say some of those moments are not, very, very hard). The other day I was telling Mark how taking care of a child is in many ways similar to taking care of animals at the clinic: you clean constantly, you have to be very aware, you have to try to decipher little sounds and observe behaviour and movements...

      And there are so many magic moments, walking in the park, watching birds, seating on a bench reading, holding her, having her crawl like a little frog on my chest.

      I have been thinking of you too. Will email you.

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